When life is especially stressful, we must be intentional about how we spend our downtime. Destressing begins with spending less time on social media. Research has found that taking a break from social media, even for just one week, improves well-being, depression, and anxiety. The strategies shared in this post can help us spend this time better.
What follows are five science-based strategies for destressing with your spouse.
Refocus Purpose
In collaboration with University of North Carolina scientists, UCLA researchers have found that happiness derived from a purpose in life has a healthier genetic effect than pleasure-seeking.
Pleasure-seeking happiness
Pleasure-seeking happiness comes from activities that provide immediate joy or sensory satisfaction. It is typically associated with enjoying life's pleasures, such as eating "soul food," drinking alcohol and doing drugs.
The joy derived from these activities can be intense but short-lived. As pleasure fades, individuals might need to seek new experiences to regain happiness, which may lead to a cyclical pattern.
In plain English, we've all experienced a hangover. It might have been fun for a few hours the night before, but the next day can be miserable.
Purpose-driven happiness
Purpose-driven happiness arises from engaging in activities that align with your values and contribute to the greater good. It is typically more enduring and provides lasting satisfaction because it's connected to deep-seated values and ongoing achievements.
The effects of purpose-driven activities tend to grow stronger over time and contribute to a sustained sense of life satisfaction. Some are fortunate enough to find their purpose in their careers, while others need to seek it out in other ways, often through volunteering.
Watch a Funny Movie
According to research shared by the Mayo Clinic, “Whether you're guffawing at a sitcom on TV or quietly giggling at a newspaper cartoon, laughing does you good. Laughter is a great form of stress relief, and that's no joke.”
My past post, 13 Romantic Comedies Husbands Can Tolerate, is a great place to turn for ideas.
Enjoy Nature
Contact with nature is associated with increases in happiness, subjective well-being, positive affect, positive social interactions, a sense of meaning and purpose in life, and decreases in mental distress. Here are ten ways you and your partner can enjoy nature:
Hiking and Walking
Explore local trails or nature reserves. Hiking can be adapted to any fitness level, from flat, easy trails to challenging mountain climbs.
Bird Watching
My wife loves to bird watch. She set up multiple feeders on our deck. To identify different species, you need only a pair of binoculars and a guidebook or app.
Photography
Nature photography can be a rewarding hobby. Capture landscapes, flora, and fauna. It's a great way to preserve memories of your outdoor adventures. With today's phones, you don't necessarily have to have a camera.
Gardening
Whether you have a yard or just a small balcony, you can start gardening. It's therapeutic and rewarding to grow your own plants or vegetables. If you're new to gardening, perhaps start small.
Camping
Spend a night under the stars to really disconnect from daily life and immerse yourself in nature. Whether in a tent, a cabin, or a sleeping bag, camping is a way to get closer to nature.
Kayaking and Canoeing
If you're near water, kayaking or canoeing can be a serene way to explore rivers, lakes, or coastal areas.
Rock Climbing
For those who like a challenge, rock climbing offers a thrilling way to engage with nature while also getting a workout.
Forest Bathing
Originating in Japan, forest bathing—simply being in the presence of trees—has been shown to reduce stress, increase energy, and boost the immune system.
Cycling
Bike on country roads or dedicated paths. It's fun to see new sights and cover more ground than walking or hiking.
Volunteering
Participate in local conservation efforts, such as beach clean-ups or tree-planting days.
Exercise
You don't even have to exercise for a long time – people report feeling happier after just ten minutes of activity. A study on more than 1.2 million adults found even greater benefits in people who exercised 45 minutes or more three or more days a week.
Here are a handful of ideas for exercising with your spouse:
Pickleball
Pickleball is the greatest adult sport ever created. I am addicted. I play at least six hours a week. It's the perfect doubles game to play with your spouse! Please take my advice; the quality of the paddle matters very much.
Biking
Go for a bike ride together, explore new neighborhoods, or enjoy nature trails. Biking is excellent for building endurance and can be a relaxing way to spend time together outdoors.
Hiking
Plan a hike in a local park or travel to scenic trails on weekends. Hiking offers a full-body workout and provides a peaceful setting to talk and enjoy each other's company away from daily distractions.
Partner Yoga
Try a yoga class together that focuses on poses that can be done as a couple. Partner yoga builds trust and communication while you both benefit from increased flexibility and stress relief.
Dance Classes
Enroll in a dance class such as salsa, ballroom, or swing. Dancing is a great workout and an intimate way to connect through rhythm and movement, offering plenty of laughs and learning opportunities.
Strength Training
Working out with weights or bodyweight exercises at home or in a gym can be more fun and motivating with a partner. You can spot each other, maintain proper form, and challenge each other with friendly competitions, such as who can do more reps or lift heavier.
Running or Jogging
Whether you prefer quiet morning jogs or participating in local 5K races, running can be a shared hobby that boosts cardiovascular health. You can set joint goals like improving your times or increasing distance and celebrate milestones together.
As for me, if you see me running, I'm running FROM something, so you'd better turn around and run away, too!
Put Up Holiday Decorations
Research shows decorating your home for the holidays will likely make you happier and strengthen social connections. Holiday decorations can signal friendliness and approachability to your neighbors.
Nostalgia can help us find meaning in life, deepen our social bonds, and even soothe collective anxiety.
If you're like me and want your Christmas Tree up well before Thanksgiving, please feel free to share this research with your spouse to make your case 🙂.
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