I Wish I Knew This One Trick 22 Years Ago
Before diving into the specifics of the "check-in" amount, it's essential to understand the foundation upon which this strategy stands: Money dates.
The Magic of Money Dates
Before diving into the specifics of the "check-in" amount, it's essential to understand the foundation upon which this strategy stands: Money dates.
Money dates are regular, scheduled meetings where you and your spouse sit down to discuss your finances openly and honestly. Think of them as relationship-building sessions focused on your financial well-being.
During a money date, you can cover topics like budgeting, upcoming expenses, financial goals, and yes, establishing your "check-in" amount. The key is to approach these dates with a positive attitude and a spirit of collaboration, rather than seeing them as a chore or a battleground.
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What is that "one trick I wish I knew 22 years ago"?
Establish a check-in amount with your spouse.
Establishing a "Check-In" Amount
So, what exactly is a "check-in" amount? It's a predetermined dollar amount that, if met or exceeded, requires you to check in with your spouse before making a purchase. This simple rule can prevent many misunderstandings and conflicts arising from unexpected expenses. For example, our marriage's "check-in" amount is $100 or more.
Here's how to establish your "check-in" amount:
Discuss Your Finances Openly
Begin with a money date where you lay all your financial cards on the table. Talk about your income, expenses, savings, and financial goals. This transparency builds trust and provides a clear picture of your financial situation.
Determine Your Threshold
Consider your overall budget and financial goals. What amount feels significant enough that it warrants a discussion? For some couples, this might be $50, while for others, it could be $500. The key is to find a number that both of you are comfortable with.
Set Clear Guidelines
Once you've agreed on a "check-in" amount, establish the rules around it. Does it apply to all purchases or only non-essential items? Are there exceptions, such as emergencies? Clarity is crucial to avoid future disputes.
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The Benefits of a "Check-In" Amount
Implementing a "check-in" amount has several benefits beyond reducing conflicts:
Enhanced Communication
Regularly checking in with each other about significant purchases fosters better communication and keeps you both in the loop about your finances.
Increased Trust
Knowing that your spouse will check in with you before making a significant purchase builds trust and demonstrates mutual respect.
Better Financial Management
With a clear understanding of your spending limits, you're less likely to make impulsive purchases that could derail your financial goals.
Stronger Relationship
Working together towards shared financial goals strengthens your relationship and reinforces the idea that you're a team.
Final Thoughts
If you're struggling with financial disagreements in your marriage, I highly recommend trying the "check-in" amount strategy. Start with a money date, establish a threshold that works for both of you and commit to checking in before making significant purchases. It might take some time to get used to, but the payoff is well worth the effort.
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